Dave Barry
Dave Barry – As a child, I was…
“As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – The four building blocks of…
“The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – The problem with winter sports…
“The problem with winter sports is that – follow me closely here – they generally take place in winter.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – I would not know how…
“I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news personalities make sad faces for sad stories and happy faces for happy stories.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – Your modern teenager is not…
“Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – I believe that we parents…
“I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – Never assume that the guy…
“Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – It is a scientific fact…
“It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person’s plate.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – What I look forward to…
“What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.”
-Dave Barry
Dave Barry – Auto racing is boring except…
“Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.”
-Dave Barry